Emerge Unstoppable in 2011!

Emerge Unstoppable in 2011! That's my mission this year. Join me as I blog about life during divorce, raising a three year old, and the fight to live one's dream of being a writer, a graphic designer, a prayerfully a success at it all.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Achieve More. Make Mistakes.

“Show me a person who has never made a mistake and I'll show you somebody who has never achieved much.” - Joan Collins

If you choose to view divorce as a mistake, that is your right. Divorce is often that fearful one thing none of us wants to face. Maybe it’s the one thing we swear will never happen to us. The security of that crystal ball never fails me. How about you?

I’ve made plenty of mistakes in my life. I’ve walked away when I should’ve stayed. I’ve held on when I should’ve let go. Hell, I’ve even let go when I probably should’ve held on. But have I learned anything? Sure.

Tonight I found myself on the phone with my soon-to-be-ex. We talked a bit after I said goodnight to Red over the phone (she’s with her dad this weekend). I shared with him how much I missed her when she wasn’t around. He was empathetic. I shared with him how some days I want to call him up and scream and yell at him in anger. Again, he understood. I declared how some days I missed him so much I wanted to tell him to come to his senses and come home. His response, “I guess I’m not the only one that feels that way.”

When we hung up the phone I pretty much sat paralyzed on the couch in my office wondering, “How should I feel?” Sadness over my loss was the first thing that struck me. Losing my husband, my family, is a devastating, embarrassing, humiliating loss. I might even call it a mistake. But, there’s no turning back now. All I can do from this point forward is be myself and learn from my mistakes.