If I Died Today, What Would You Say?

Today's topic is difficult for most people. It is that of our mortality. In W. Gary Gore’s book Navigating Change he asks yet another tough question: What would my family, friends and associates say about me if I died today?

My life has been so upside down lately that I can only imagine my friends, family and associates being grateful I am…gone. I mean really, I’ve had nothing to talk about but sad, angry, lonely poop that has happened in my life over the last eight months or so. Who wants to listen to that? Even I don't want to listen to that anymore.

Honestly, that's why I’m on this journey to determine my core purpose, the meaning of my life. What I’ve found over the last eight months is that I haven’t been a good friend. I have been difficult to talk to, to listen to; I have been frustrated, angry, hurt and have nothing to intellectual to share. I don’t want to be that person anymore. So what would my friends, family and associates say about me if I died today?

• Finally! She found some peace.
• We didn't see her enough!
• We'll miss her spirit!

That's not how I want to leave this life or this world. So I'm going to leave with you my favorite poem by Andrea Alban Gosline:

Sing my song
In children dancing

And lovebirds soaring
From the nest to the moon.

Tell my story
To jasmine twining
And willows swaying
In the long summer sun.

Look for me
In peaceful eyes of mothers
And faces of their babies
In contented sleep.

Remember me
In quiet nights of winter
And mornings of new flowers,
Dreaming of spring.

Living life isn’t about the bad. It isn’t about sharing what hurts. It’s about sharing what you are grateful for and let me tell you, I’m grateful for so many things (another post for another day). No really, I made a list.

What about you? What would your friends, family and associates say if you died today? How does that make you feel? Would you change anything?

Living a grateful life, I remain Unstoppable.

Truth or Fiction - A Question

You cannot give your life more days, but you can give your days more life.

- Unknown

It's time to wax philosophic. True or false - how do you feel about the quote? Can you or can't you give your life more days? Can you or can't you give your days more life?

I believe you can do both. Only me. Not speaking for anyone else here.

Some might take the stance that our Maker knows how many days we have from the get go. I believe that, but I also believe we, as non-makers, have the ability to mess it all up by eating unhealthy food, playing video games instead of taking walks, in general not taking care of ourselves. So, yes, I think you can give your life more days.

And, well, you already know how I feel about giving your days more life. It's a given. Unless you cannot pull yourself out of the doldrums of hell, life is riddled with disease, addiction, pain - nope, not even that line works for me. I've seen people who could be hopeless be huge contributors to their own wonderful, empowered lives. You can add more life to your days no matter what. Period. And, if you're having trouble, ask for help. Friends, family, professionals are all here to help so you can live free and happy.

The short but sweet beginning to an argument of sorts. What do you think?

Hoping you'll join the conversation, I remain Unstoppable.

Wisdom Wednesday – A Change of Pace and a Recipe

So, if you’ve been with me the last few weeks, since the re-launch of this blog, then you know that I firmly believe in harnessing your inner strength, being flexible, and being the person you are meant to be. Yep, that’ me in a nutshell.

It hit me this morning as I was lying in bed listening to the rain pelt the trampoline outside my open window, that you haven’t really, and I mean really, seen the other facets of my personality. Could I possibly preach all the time? That would be a resounding, “Hell NO!” I have many other beliefs, joys and passions, not the least of which is cooking. So today, I wanted to share a recipe from my first novel, the one that went nowhere but taught me so much I owe it homage (crying uncontrollably, writhing in pain over THAT birthing). The name of the project is Feel Better Butter and someday I will go back and revise it with all that I have learned and try again to find a home for it - other than the file box underneath my desk - but for today I will share with you a little piece of it – the recipe for Feel Better Butter and a feel good snack. Don’t laugh! This is for real. I promise. And, you won’t regret it if you make your way into the kitchen to prepare the recipe.

Many thanks to Tyler Florence for being the inspiration for my butter recipe that morphed into a novel. Buddy, I’ll cook for you next time you make it to Atlanta!

Now, before I dive right into the recipe you need to understand the healing powers of some of its ingredients. 1) Rosemary helps in depression, muscle-relaxation, anxiety and calmness. I’ll bet you’re feeling better already. And 2) Lavender is used in treating various emotional problems like body relaxation during pain by acting as a cooling herb. These two healing herbs work together with other yummy, comforting ingredients to make the recipe for Feel Better Butter absolutely magical (Sarah Addison Allen…keep out, or call me).

Feel Better Butter

Ingredients:
1 qt. heavy cream
Zest of one orange
1 tsp. dried lavender (the culinary derivation)
1 tsp. dried rosemary
½ cup good honey
1 pinch salt

Method:
In a food processor bowl add all the ingredients and turn on high. The liquid will slosh, whip, then separate after about four minutes. When the mixture separates (these are the butter solids and buttermilk) stop processing and strain out the buttermilk (reserve the buttermilk for the fried chicken you will be making for dinner because you feel inspired to cook) – there should be just under a cup. Take out the butter and squeeze dry. Kneed the butter a bit to form a nice ball then refrigerate it until you are ready to use it. Easy enough, right? Thanks again, Tyler!

Butter is done; now let’s look at our pantry. Let me give you a little black bra insight – every time you go to the grocery you must purchase the following items: fabulous dark chocolate (not the cheap kind), a fresh toasty baguette, the best brie available, soft goat cheese, fresh fruit of your liking (I prefer pears and apples), and a bottle of your favorite wine. Hey, at least I didn’t tell you to buy snails. Any successful woman needs these staples in order to survive. Don’t believe me? Okay, next time you have a rough day toast up the following recipe, pour yourself a glass of wine, and snuggle up with a good book. You’ll see what I mean.

A Truly Feel Better Snack

Ingredients:
Toasty baguette
Brie
Dark Chocolate
Feel Better Butter (from above)

Method:
Cut baguette into 4 inch sections (if you are making for more than one person, otherwise, slice 4 inches for yourself and reserve the rest for tomorrow because you will want this again). Slice baguette in half cross-wise like you are making a hoagie. Spread open-face baguette with a generous helping of Feel Better Butter, then lay down the lovely chocolate squares, enough but not too many because it gets all sorts of messy, and on top of the chocolate lay ½ inch brie slices enough to cover the bread. Place the open face baguette on a piece of tin foil and put it in a 350 degree oven for approximately ten minutes or until it looks just perfect (you’ll know). If you can’t wait ten minutes, use the broiler but the bread won’t be as crunchy. I’m just sayin’. After you have waited ten minutes, you must wait another ten for this yummy goodness to cool unless you want to drip brie and melted chocolate on everything. I personally don’t mind a little mess. Enjoy!

So there you have a little light-hearted wisdom this Wednesday and a new recipe for a day when you really need it, or you just want it. It’s what makes me Unstoppable. Give it a try. Until tomorrow, I remain grateful you are with me on my journey.

Thankful...

Today, and every day, I am thankful for my husband, my little red-head, a father who pushed hard and a mother who cared almost to a fault; sunshine, wind, clouds, and rain, and even on occasion, fog rolling in over grey sandy beaches reminding me that even the most joyous places sometimes need a blanket to snuggle under; trees, and grass, and flowers of all sorts that share with us the power of growth and renewal; I'm thankful for hand-sewn quilts and the nimble fingers that so carefully stitched them; for dogs and cats and squirrels and all the little critters that keep us entertained on afternoon walks; for friends that come in all shapes, sizes, and origins who care nothing about the mistakes I've made, but who I've become because of those mistakes; for a family who so lovingly and joyously celebrates the goodness, shares hugs in the sadness, and rejoices in the light of each new day; Today I'm thankful for everything I've learned this year as a woman, a mom, a wife, a novelist, a domestic, a freelancer, an editor, a friend. Most importantly, I'm thankful for you. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. May your day be filled with everything you are thankful for.

Until next time I remain, Unstoppable.