Would You Notice?

Still on the path of self discovery with W. Gary Gore, I find myself asking this next tough, yet inspiring question: Would others notice if I cease to exist?

Well, of course! I am the center of your universe, aren't I? You would miss these blog posts everyday and the pleasure of my voice on the other end of the line, right? We can only hope to touch someone's life to the point that they might miss us even a little. But the truth of the matter is most of the people we touch we will affect once and never see them again.

So, the answer to the question for me is: Yes, I believe a select few would miss me for a minute, then they would go about their lives as normal. Others wouldn't notice at all.

My question to myself in taking this a few steps further is this: If I have the rare opportunity to make a difference in someone's life but once, then why not seize that opportunity and make that one instance all it can be? My answer: Why not?

Alright, you all are being conspicuously quiet. It's time to join the conversation. What are your thoughts?

Why?

Yesterday I clued you in on what I want to do with my life, a challenge set forth by W. Gary Gore in his book, Navigating Change. Here is what I said: 


I want to be a positive example of a mother, a friend, a leader (in that order). I want to empower and inspire the people in my life and those who I reach, to be their best selves. I want to experience ultimate joy, selflessness, wealth, success and security for both myself and my daughter through my actions (after all that is all I can control). I want to enjoy the benefit of spiritual peace and abundance.

I think what I want to do with my life sounds fair, certainly reasonable, and very doable. But then he asks why this is important to know. Well...

I may be jumping of the same cliff all of his students have before me, but I think it's important to know this so I can point myself in the direction of what I want and start my journey.

Here I go...

 

My Current Daily Reading List:

• Simple Abundance – A Daybook of Comfort and Joy by Sarah Ban Breathnach (AM)
• Navigating Change by W. Gary Gore (AM)
• The 9 Steps to Financial Freedom by Suze Orman (AM)
• Praying Our Goodbyes by Joyce Rupp (PM)
• Think: Straight Talk for Women to Stay Smart in a Dumbed-Down World by Lisa Bloom (PM)
• Audio: Lord of the Flies written and read by William Golding (PM)

I encourage you to pick up a life-changing book today

Liberation...Kind Of

Ah, FREEDOM!

I was reminded this morning by a follower that I need to stop the BS. Stop BS'ing my way through each day like everything is okay and start letting this divorce mess go. God, it's hard!

Reminders come in droves daily. Even my soon-to-be wasband said to me last week, "It's been eight months. Why can't you move on?" Taken out of context you might think that I had gone crawling back to him asking to try again. Let me assure you, that was NOT the case. I was actually expressing to him that it wasn't a good time to talk because I was in "hater" mode and I didn't want to cause any friction between us. Better? Thought so.

The thing is, it was easy for him to move on. He took a weekend, packed what he wanted and moved into an empty apartment with newly steam-cleaned carpets and freshly painted walls. He walked away from the daily responsibility of hugging, communicating, listening, bathing, feeding, clothing his family and found himself alone with time to himself to process this vast amount of change. Wow! Now, if I wanted a fresh start that is certainly the way I'd do it given the option. But that wasn't my option. I, instead, was left with no job, a mortgage, and the daily grind of hugging, communicating, listening, bathing, feeding and clothing my family in a home still filled with memories of a marriage.

His comment really tossed me a curve ball. So I sat. And, I thought about it. This was my conclusion...I haven't moved on because I've had all of 68 days to myself inside of eight months to process the fact that we are no longer a family. I am a single mom trying to accomplish great things in my life like becoming a published author, and at this moment, hell, just re-entering the workforce. Sixty-eight days is not a long time to tackle very much on either of those fronts, forget the emotional mayhem.

So, as little Red went off to her father's this past weekend I took it upon myself to do some liberating. Liberating of space. I hired the man down the street (Tony, who is terrific BTW for anyone living here in Medlock Park) to help me go through the loads of crap down in the basement, clean out the crawl space, purge the soon-to-be's stuff from my life. What was a basement full of junk that needed to go is now a craft room, playroom, and extra living area with a couch and tv for watching movies in the darkest of dark rooms. Okay, so there is still a wall filled with things that need to be put in our next yard sale, but my power tools are separate from my hand tools, my screws no longer reside with my nails, and I know where all of those gifts I pre-purchased for birthdays and holidays are now. I even installed shelving at the laundry area to keep things neat and tidy. And, I got to use my screw gun, AGAIN! I love being a girl.

So, for all of you out there suffering the mourning that accompanies divorce, I say, "Liberate yourself!" Stop holding on to the stuff. Let it go. It's time for a fresh, clean start.

Thanks DannJ for kicking me in the ass. I sure needed it.

Until next time, I remain Unstoppable.

Love in Five Parts - Part IV - Loving, Healthy Kids

All we need is a little...

Love is an emotion that is difficult to share if for no other reason than because it lays bare the sacredness of one’s own heart. But I’ve found the more I talk about love, give love, and invite love the more love I receive. I’m not afraid to face the reflection in the mirror because I have been open with my heart. Have I always made the right decisions? Oh h-e-double hockey sticks no! But, I can go to my grave knowing I stayed true to my heart.

When I look at my young daughter I often think how sad it would be if she never felt love, but it’s not fair of me to force it upon her, so I sit back and wait for the invitation to love her on her terms. Sounds sort of counterintuitive, but even a three year old deserves respect, space and individuality. Who am I to take that from her? But she also deserves love – healthy, hopeful, joyful love.

My sure fire sign that loving, supportive roles are at play is when she sits in my office chair and says, “I am the mommy and you are the little girl.” I laugh and say, “Okay Mommy, what are we up to today?” “Honey, I’m working on my book right now,” she says pointing at the screen. It goes on like this for a while and then I say, “Okay, it’s my turn. Let’s take a break and snuggle for a while.” Agreeing, she bounds into the living room and hops onto the couch and starts ticking off her favorite movies and asks with a very sweet “please” (usually) for me to put one in. Then we curl up on our pillows and watch for a while as her favorite heroes and heroines save the day and fall in love. I always rib her about the heroine kissing the hero and she laughs. It’s not the same laugh as comes with a Scooby Doo fart scene, but hey, not everything warrants uproarious laughter.

When I question my decision about staying home with her even when we face losing everything I don’t regret my choice. Through the ups and downs of radical marital change she has emerged a well-adjusted little girl with healthy emotions and views on love. I believe that is because I refuse to hide my emotions from her and because I respect her needs like that of space, or snuggling. In the end that’s what all this is about anyway – taking what we know and passing it on in a good way, right?

I’m turning it over to you. Do you see how your love lessons have affected your children or your reflection? Do you struggle to overcome the past to build a healthier, happier future?

Today’s shameless marketing - Join me and Pam Asberry tomorrow at WritersLi.P.P. You might be in for a surprise. Until then, I remain the Unstoppable Ms. Start.

ABCs for New Writers – K is for Knowledge is Key

Today’s blog topic/title probably sounds a bit cliché, but it’s true. I’ve found in life, business, love and writing the more you know the more prepared you are for contingencies. The term “contingencies” makes life, love and writing sound sterile, doesn’t it? I’m just practical gal that way.

Here’s an extreme example: You buckle yourself into a narrow seat on a McDonnell Douglas MD-88. You have very little leg room just like everyone else, and the same pocket in front of you with Sky Mall Magazine and flight safety placard. Do you choose to ignore the flight attendants as they explain where to find the necessary equipment to save your life and someone else’s and use the safety leaflet as a bookmark instead of memorizing it as you taxi down the tarmac – or – do you take a few minutes to verse yourself on floatation devices, exits, and overall air traveler’s rights so you are prepared in case of an emergency? I don’t know about you, but I am annoyed at the number of people these days that take that small effort for granted. And it peeves me to no end to know that I am taking the all important extra step to save them by increasing my knowledge about safety precautions when I would just as soon let them suffer their chosen fate due to laziness.

The same goes for writing. If you don’t take the time, spend the money, make the effort to improve your knowledge of the craft, publishing, even 21st century language then you are going to choose your fate as well. It’s not easy. Life is a time suck. We’ve all been there. But it behooves you to set aside 20 minutes each day to catch up with Publisher’s weekly and read an excerpt the host of books available to writers in this business. It is also worth the investment to join your local  - Georgia Romance Writers - and national - Romance Writers of America - writer’s associations and spend two or three hours a month with others in your field.

If you don’t go that extra mile to educate yourself you can die an unfortunate death in this business due to lack of knowledge if nothing else. What’s it worth to you?

Until tomorrow, I remain the Unstoppable and ever learning Ms. Start.

A teensy-weensy little bit of shameless marketing - Pam Asberry and I launched http://www.writerslipp.com/ on Monday. It's a blog for writers, non-writers, women, men, lovers, and fighters about life and love in penned perspective. Stop by this week and meet us. Leave a comment and follow us for a chance to win some cool prizes!

Love in Five Parts – Part III – For All the Men I’ve Loved Before

Are you ready for this? This is like the most intimate 20 minutes I have ever spent in my life. No joke. Sit and relax and read about the men I have loved, how they have influenced me, and where I’m headed. Ready? Here we go…

True love has found me three times in my life. No, I haven’t only enjoyed three relationships. I’m talking the real thing. That thing folks hope for – true love. My first true love I met when I was fifteen. He was so incredible that I dumped my boyfriend just because he was brazen enough to bow up at him in public. Through ups, downs, breakups and reconciliations we married, divorced, married and divorced. Walking through fire wasn’t enough to keep me away from him, but the threat of becoming a Molotov cocktail was enough to make me realize there was more to life than fear.

The second great love of my life taught me about romance and how real men treat real women. He held me when I broke down, made love to my mind, body and soul, challenged me to always be the better person, and to love with my whole heart. He taught me how to see myself the way he saw me and understand that a loving touch in just the right place lights me up like a fire cracker (minds out of the gutter people – my “g” spot is in the small of my back).

I’m still reeling from the pain of losing the love that lowered my guard and produced the most amazing little girl EVER. I can still remember the first day he knocked on my door and how he looked in his butter yellow cotton shirt and faded blue jeans. Or how we used to kiss for what seemed like hours finally forcing ourselves apart so we could go to work. The look on his face when I walked down the aisle, when he held his little girl for the first time, when I surprised him for his 40th - there’s nothing like those unforgettable loving moments.

All of these men have taught me so much about myself. In fact, I think first and foremost, they’ve taught me who I am but they have also shown me what I want. I can’t imagine ever opening my heart to another, other than my daughter and family, for a long time. When and if I do that’s it; no more doormat. And boy is this guy going to have to be something special. He’s going to have to be a real man, someone who can hold his own in life and with me. A man who knows where to touch me, how to kiss me, how to appreciate making a wrong turn or wrong decision and learning from it, a reader to my writer, a cook, a partner, who loves to laugh and doesn’t pick or criticize, who feels secure in himself and safe with me. He will have his own interests and will want to include me, and will in turn accept and be interested in mine. God, let there be a man with one green eye and one blue who smells of chocolate chip cookies and whose favorite shape is a silver, five-pointed star. God, let there be that family man.

Join the conversation. What loves have influenced your life? Are there particular qualities in your man, woman, or the partner of your dreams that you cannot live without?

Trying desperately to get back into the groove, I am still Unstoppable and still end in Start!

Love in Five Parts - Part II

So, if I were to tell you my father was a narcissist to the nth degree could you understand how I love him? What about if I told you my mother passed her codependency on to me, could you see how I love her? How about this…what if I told you I love myself even though I inherited some of both my parent’s character defects? Could you love me too?

It’s a fascinating study in human behavior, this need to love and feel love. What exactly does love do for us? Does it provide wealth, freedom, stability, anything tangible? No. Does it feed us, clothe us, and keep a roof over our head? I guess that depends on your perspective, but not really.

I think love as it is defined (refer to last week’s post – Part I) gives us wings. Oh heck, now that’s a Hallmark card in the making. Sorry. Love gives us the opportunity to put ourselves out there to another human being. We lay bear our hearts, souls, brains to someone else. It’s terrifying and freeing all at the same time.

And what if our way of love is tempered by narcissistic or codependent parents, or both? Then how do we put forth, or even know, what it is we want to give and receive in love?

I learned a lot from my parents, which is what I will share today. This is Part II after all and a fitting place, the first layer of ingredients in our L-O-V-E pie. Sounds kind of dirty, doesn’t it? Well, it’s not!

I have always loved my parents and I think, despite all the hell I put them through, my parents have always loved me. I know they both came from very difficult circumstances in their own childhoods and as an adult I try to grasp every part of that, and how they raised me, in order to more fully understand and love them. Whew!

My father travelled a lot when I was young which I guess left me always wanting for his attention. When he was home he was typically in need of space. Needless to say, I was a busy-body and probably always in his way. But, my dad did a great job at giving me all of the opportunities and benefits he didn’t have as a child. I traveled, attended nice dinners, private schools, and for the most part got what I wanted when I wanted it. Those things did not make up for Dad not being around. I still missed him and that put me in a position to want a man’s love and attention very early on.

My mom, on the other hand, was a doting, caring, loving mom who stood by me through thick and thin. Anyone would want that, right? But, what neither of us got at the time, and I think this is the case of most parents and children, is that I needed to stand on my own two feet, learn lessons the hard way, crack my freaking skull so I’d know not to traverse the rocks of the river in flood waters. You know? So yes, mom was always there but because I had never felt the pain of making my own mistakes, I thought at a very early age that I knew what was best for me.

They influenced me in both extremely positive and terribly negative ways. As an adult I have studied their individual impacts on me and hope that I have learned enough junior psychology not to pass along certain tendencies to my daughter. However, the best ones I pray she will get tenfold, like patience, kindness, a bright smile, a willingness to own up to her mistakes, to give freely of herself. These are the things I want for her.

I will leave you to digest Part II and eagerly await Part III. A cliffhanger of sorts. Until next week, jump in with both feet and tell me about your upbringing and the people who influenced you. Do you recognize what you do today that you adopted from your childhood? Are there things you wish you could change?

Until tomorrow, I remain Unstoppable.

ABCs for New Writers - "I" is for Inspire

For all intents and purposes I mean inspire others, but as with everything, this is somewhat karmic (what goes out comes back tenfold). Why? As you uplift others and propel them forward to follow their own dreams, so too are you moved forward toward your own. Deep, huh? Some day you’ll find that quote in Bartlett’s.

I witness it each day in my own life as well as the lives of my fellow writers. When you are able to share your stories, struggles and triumphs included, the individuals who follow your progress also become ready to try their hand at what they want most out of life. In other words, before you even publish your very first work you can affect lives. Ultimately isn’t that why we become writers, because we want to touch people, to pass on a message, to help them in some small way?

I interpret a writers “voice” in this way. It is the message that one intends to convey not the means by which one conveys it. (Boy, Bartlett’s here I come!) And though voice is a topic for another day, one that you will understand better by the time we get there, it bears weight in today’s conversation. As you share your story, your progress, you develop your voice.

I get e-mails from friends and readers regularly that say simply, “great job!” or “keep going!” Those small messages give me the courage I need to keep walking the path toward my ultimate goal of becoming a published author. The best ones though are the ones that read, “This was just what I needed to hear today. Thank you.” Those words can keep me going strong for days.

Reading the blogs of my fellow writers I see the same messages shared in the comments. In turn, I hear them speak about how friends and followers have inspired them and the circle continues because then I am inspired to share my story with you hoping that you will tell your story…see where I’m going with this. It creates a visual Microsoft might envy for a screen-saver – colorful, dramatic circles of sharing that keep going and going until someone touches the keyboard.

There are so many ways to share your story in today’s digital world. If you are afraid, or don’t understand something, ask for help. You can write a blog, tweet on Twitter, post your story on Facebook or all of the above, all in short bursts of words, that if done strategically, not only inspire others but help develop your platform and grow your audience. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. After all, we’re only at the letter “I”.

Join the conversation. Have you reached others by sharing your story? Would you like to? What would hold you back? What is your favorite comment, so far?

Until Wisdom Wednesday and Part II of Love in Five Parts, I remain Unstoppable.

Truth or Fiction - A Question

You cannot give your life more days, but you can give your days more life.

- Unknown

It's time to wax philosophic. True or false - how do you feel about the quote? Can you or can't you give your life more days? Can you or can't you give your days more life?

I believe you can do both. Only me. Not speaking for anyone else here.

Some might take the stance that our Maker knows how many days we have from the get go. I believe that, but I also believe we, as non-makers, have the ability to mess it all up by eating unhealthy food, playing video games instead of taking walks, in general not taking care of ourselves. So, yes, I think you can give your life more days.

And, well, you already know how I feel about giving your days more life. It's a given. Unless you cannot pull yourself out of the doldrums of hell, life is riddled with disease, addiction, pain - nope, not even that line works for me. I've seen people who could be hopeless be huge contributors to their own wonderful, empowered lives. You can add more life to your days no matter what. Period. And, if you're having trouble, ask for help. Friends, family, professionals are all here to help so you can live free and happy.

The short but sweet beginning to an argument of sorts. What do you think?

Hoping you'll join the conversation, I remain Unstoppable.

ABCs for New Writers - "C" is for Closed Mouth

In the beginning I did say that Malleable Monday is what you make it and these ABCs are for NEW writers, right? Well, some of us who have been at it for a while need this same gentle reminder: In order to learn about anything you must close your mouth and open your mind. In essence, no matter how good you think you are, you still have more to learn. We all do!

Seriously, don’t pay good money to attend a conference, class or workshop unless you are going to listen. Don’t monopolize a conversation with your tidbits of wisdom unless they are called for. Stop and think if what you want to contribute is truly relevant. I’m not preachin’ I’m just sayin’.

Look, I don’t share these things because I know best. I offer my tidbits to save you a little time, frustration and money. Be it a class that is boasted as one thing and turns out to be another, or a conference you have high expectations for only to be let down, a blog post or a conversation with a dear friend, there is always (ALWAYS) something to sink your teeth into – to learn.

Take today’s Petit Fours and Hot Tamales post by fellow writer, Sally Kilpatrick. She paid attention in church and found comparison between storytelling and accompaniment. She discussed how beautiful words can often mask a poor storyline and how instead the writing should be an accompanist, like a good organist, not to overshadow an intriguing plot. I was listening recently when fellow author C.L. Wilson spoke about the most touching review she ever received. Her tearful confession was one I needed to hear. She said that many people will read your works, some will be happy and some won’t, but those who you are privileged enough to touch are the ones that truly matter.

Writer or human, if you are going to be privy to impacting someone’s life, their soul or spirit, don’t you want to be as well informed as possible? Balanced? I’m not saying don’t contribute. And, if you know me, you know I’m not saying don’t stand up for what you believe. What I am trying to convey is the importance of paying attention, listening to what others and your surroundings have to offer, because ultimately, it will be what you share too. Everything comes and goes full circle. Gain wisdom that you’ll be proud to extend some day.

It’s time for you to join the conversation. Is there something you’ve picked up on recently in a place or situation that you weren’t otherwise happy with? Have you found yourself offering unwarranted advice to others instead of just listening to what they have to say? Leave a comment for your peers.

Until Wisdom Wednesday, I remain tight-lipped and Unstoppable.

Wisdom Wednesday - Get Derailed, But Only For A Minute

There’s nothing like the pain and frustration that accompany getting derailed in life. Whether you are following your dream of becoming a writer, pursuing a new career path, or finding comfort in staying home to raise a child, when “life happens” and your speeding locomotive jumps the track, what do you do?

As someone who has experienced this phenomenon this week, I must say I’ve been given some of the best advice. One dear friend told me, “Wallow. Take the time you need to wallow today, but tomorrow, get your butt back to work, dig your toes in and be stubborn about it.”

So I did. But, instead of wallowing alone I invited friends to join me. I had lunch with a handful of wonderful people including a man I recently completed book edits for, followed by a visit from two besties. Once the visits were over and I had found some peace, I got some sleep. This morning brought a visit by my two critique partners, Pam Asberry and Pamela Mason, and some sense of digging my toes in. And this afternoon the fog cleared from my brain and I moved on a bit, my bitterness quelled by a nice dinner out with an old friend.

I guess the point is it doesn’t matter what comes out of life’s tunnels to throw you off track, take a break if you need to but get back on track as quickly as you can. Hold onto the dreams you have built for yourself. Don’t give in completely to the derailment. In the end you have only yourself to be accountable to. I don’t know about you, but I really don’t want to have to face disappointing myself.

Mary Tyler Moore once said, “You can’t be brave if you’ve only had wonderful things happen to you.” So, take firm grasp of the bull in the middle of your life’s track, wrestle with it, and then move it out of your way. You have much more important things to focus on.

Until tomorrow’s Truth or Fiction, I remain Unstoppable.

Truth or Fiction - The Reveal

Well, if you thought the story was true, in one instance you were right. The meal was very real, and look what it inspired.

As a writer one of the most important things for me to remember is inspiration comes from anywhere and everywhere. This meal made my night some 16 years ago, and to this day I can still find a way to write about it.

Interesting thought, isn't it? What small thing can you recall from 16 years ago that might inspire you to write something today? Take a minute and let that thought bring out your inner-writer.

Until Malleable Monday and the letter "B" for new writers, I remain Unstoppable.

Wisdom Wednesday - Is Self-Defeat Defeating You?

Some days I can’t turn my face away from the ground. Life’s drama – too much work, too little time, too many “mommy, mommy, MOMMYs!” and nary enough hands or brains – oftentimes has me so afraid of “what ifs” that I can’t comprehend how to even pick up and do thing number one. How frustrating it is to wake up and know immediately that the few blessed hours you get in a day have already been eaten up with time commitments. It’s debilitating.

Self-defeat can be the first obstacle some of us have to overcome each day. Don’t think you fall into this category? I didn’t either until a memo citing some traits of self-defeating behavior crossed my desk. In shock, I, the self-sufficient learner-by-osmosis read the statement, “I don’t need help, I’ll figure it out myself.” Now wait a minute! That sounded just like me. But how is that self-defeating behavior?

At that moment I realized that not asking for help to learn or accomplish what I need to grow and thrive in life holds me back. Look at the wealth of knowledge I can access just by messaging someone on Facebook or Twitter – moms, writers, family, sitters, and business people like myself – all right there for the asking.

Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. – Helen Keller

In the face of unbelievable adversity, Helen Keller became the first deaf blind person to graduate from college. If she can experience such amazing achievement in her life, then what in the world could I have to worry about? It’s all relative. We all have our own personal hardships.

When I get out of sorts with misfortunes and the “to dos” of the day, I put on my project management cap and make a list. Though these lists are pretty darn long, at least the things that need accomplishing are on paper. It’s a start and something I have to do before I even know what I need help with.

Next, I prioritize. The key to getting things done in my life is knowing what to let go of. This all too critical stage of time structuring allows me the chance to take what I consider an emergency and imagine it being stricken with a sharp steel axe, chopped right out of my day. Okay, the visual is a little violent, but it works for me. The beautiful thing about the axe is that each day I must face a plethora of responsibilities: my day job, cleaning, laundry, cooking, WIP revisions, whatever “bad thing” must happen (this morning it was a coffee pot spewing coffee onto the counter vs. in the pot), and spending quality time with my little girl. The picture just became clearer to you, didn’t it? It’s impossible for me to imagine the dreaded axe chopping my daughter out of my day. To me, the image is grotesque, and like the reality, I could never allow it to happen.

Finally, I make the necessary cuts and ask for help where I need it. When faced with lengthy projects at work, a blog to write, and family in town yesterday I chopped out vacuuming the floors and running errands, and asked my mom to help by making dinner, so I could spend time with my little girl laughing, playing, and watching a movie. Not only did we get to bond, she got my full attention and lots of love and kisses and I got to see life through her eyes – much less serious and without drop-deadlines.

There may not have been a lot of sun in Atlanta today, but the sky was bright enough and we kept our heads up so the shadows remained out of sight. It made for another Unstoppable day.

Join the conversation. What are some difficulties you’ve faced lately? How do you prioritize? What are you willing to cut out of your day to make time for what’s important? What gives you strength and inspiration in the face of adversity? Do you ask for help when you need it?

I look forward to seeing you here tomorrow for Truth or Fiction Thursday. Until then, I remain Unstoppable.

Malleable Monday - "A" is for Abstract

Welcome to Malleable Monday and the first letter in the new writer’s alphabet. This is for those folks who desire nothing more than a cliff to take a leap of faith from. This is not a lesson in the business of publishing, nor is it necessarily about craft, but more the direction and motivation new writers need to put pen to paper and get writing.

“A” is for Abstract, as in “to think in the abstract.” It means without reference to specific circumstances or practical experience (Collins English Dictionary - Complete & Unabridged 10th Edition 2009 © William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1979, 1986 © HarperCollins Publishers 1998, 2000, 2003, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2009

Let’s start with the simple idea of letting go of what we know and experience everyday and delve into abstract thinking. I’m certain in each of you the same school of thought has been implanted – writers write what they know.

Is that true? It is entirely possible. The difference between a fantastic fiction writer and anyone else is their ability to take everyday experiences and spin them into the abstract. Say, for instance, you take a walk early one morning (a bit of my own advice for new writers) and on your walk the air is thick with moisture and carries with it the rich, hearty smell of bacon frying in the pan. It’s a lovely experience, no doubt, but if it inspires you to write something what will that be - I smelled bacon on my walk this morning. A good start, but go one conceptual step further.

Are you a Sci-Fi writer? Maybe the rich, hearty smell is the smell of the 900-foot tall spindle trees on your planet that reach into the atmosphere to feed off grease-filled troposphere. If you’re a romance writer, maybe that’s your overnight conquest in the kitchen courting you with his culinary prowess. Or, if you write suspense, that could be something other than bacon frying in the pan, if you know what I mean.

Point is James Cameron didn’t make Avatar a grand success by producing a story about a marine who was dispatched on a mission during wartime to find his loyalties lie with the people he is charged to eradicate. Though touching, we often experience war, growth, and relationships in person or on the evening news. No, James Cameron made Avatar a captivating story by creating a visually fantastic world we were unfamiliar with, and drawing us into stunning characters we could relate to like a paraplegic marine thrust into a computerized capsule in order to take on the identity of his enemy. Does your protagonist have to be blue in order to encourage emotion? Absolutely not, but your story has to be fresh, different, an original idea from your brain containing imaginative, thought-provoking content, characters and scenery.

Does the idea of abstract thinking test you? Good. Sometimes the best things in life come out of challenge. Try reinventing yourself at forty, or making a career change at fifty-five. Sure it’s difficult, but who said rewards come easy.

Now, it’s time for you to join the conversation. Whether you are a new writer or someone who has published thirty books, if you’re reading this take a minute to share one teensy-weensy abstract thought. Pick one of the following basic subjects: 1) Bright yellow daffodils lifting their heads to the noonday sun; 2) an azure sky filled with fire; or 3) the sound of silence from a snow-covered mountain top and write the abstract start it inspires in you. Go all out! Put your craziest, weirdest, most out-of-the-box thoughts into a sentence or two and comment. Let’s see what our peers have to say.

Until Wednesday, I remain Unstoppable